Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that
the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of
space and valuable resources. No mention of this was included with the
product information. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other
programs and now launches during system initialization, where it monitors
all other system activity.
Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing
7.5, and Racing 3.6 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected. I
can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my
favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but
the uninstall doesn't work on Wife1.0.
Please help!!!!!! Thanks, A Troubled User.
REPLY:
Dear Troubled User:
This is a very common problem that men complain about. It is due to a
primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0,
thinking that it is merely a Utilities and Entertainment program.
Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run
EVERYTHING!!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to
Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden operating systems files cause Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate
Wife 1.0, so nothing is gained. It is impossible to uninstall,
delete, or purge the program files from the system once installed.
You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not
allow this. Some have tried Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more
problems than in the original system. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under
"Warnings--Alimony/Child Support." I recommend that you
keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the
background application Yes Dear to alleviate software augmentation.
Having installed Wife 1.0 myself, I also suggest that you read the entire
section regarding 'General Partnership Faults' (GPFs). You must assume joint
responsibility for any faults and problems that occur, regardless of their
cause.
You will also find that GPFs are cyclical. The best course of action is to
enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE. Avoid excessive use of C:\YESDEAR because
ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system
will return to normal anyway.
Remember the system will run smoothly as long as you share the blame for all
GPFs. Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance.
Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep
3.0, Cook It 1.5 (which replaces Burn It 1.0), and Do Bills 4.2. You must,
however, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause
the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way
to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software.
I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 should this happen.
WARNING!!!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short
Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause
irreversible damage to the operating system